The FT's Lucy Kellaway has to be one of the finest commentators on the absurdity of the corporate world.  She alone makes the cost of an FT subscription worthwhile. 

And this week she picks on the unfortunately rebranding of Siemans healthcare devision as...wait for it...Siemans Healthineers. 

See what they did there - health and engineers - healthineers. 

She highlights three golden rules of corporate comms.

1. Never have a corporate song (remember the E&Y recruitment song.  For those who have forgotten, take a look -

2. Resist portmanteau words - healthineer, innovalue, ideation

3. Claims to be one firm with one dream can make you look foolish.  This is something professional services firms gravitate towards.  

And of all Lucy's rules - no more corporate songs.  Leave that to the kids.